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I worked for Landmark in Perth, Australia between July 1997 - September 1999 as a Participation Manager, Self Expression and Leadership Program registration Manager, Assisting Program Manager and Communication Curriculum Manager.

My assisting agreements included being a Team Management and Leadership Program Classroom Leader and Introduction Leader, and I also participated in seminars to further develop my participation manager skills and register people into the seminars.

During the Introduction Leaders' program I 'did' a communication course (CPP) in Melbourne and came back to Perth absolutely buzzing with what I'd 'gotten'... so much so that I was on the phone to people who had expressed an interest in doing the CPP, people who had registered and withdrawn, people who had already done the course (they should do it again)... I even stood up at the ILP and did the classic Landmark, "put up your hand if you haven't done CPP yet... OK, see me at the end of the class and let me share about it".

Up until that point I'd been a mouse in ILP, so my transformation got peoples' attention... the Centre manager included. She placed an application form for the up and coming Participation Manager position under my nose in between me calling people.

I was really surprised to be considered for the job... my first thought was "NO WAY... who, me? I haven't got what it takes..." and then I thought about it, asked some questions and went for an interview. I got the job and agreed to work between 10am-9pm Mon-Friday, 10am-6pm on Saturdays, with $24K as an annual salary.... including Gold star health cover and bonuses... and I agreed to be in communication when I came up against the imaginary brick walls that were bound to crop up every now and again.

My life at that point was a little crazy, in January of that year my housemate had committed suicide in our studio. We'd been sharing a really funky 2.5 story apartment in North Fremantle for 9 months, had 'done' the Landmark Forum a month prior, and it seemed like he was moving ahead with his life as a result of doing the course.

He had a few issues to resolve, being a French, Morrocan Jew with a daughter to an Australian woman he met in Jerusalem a few years earlier.... while he was connecting to his source of being Jewish and seriously sort out whether or not he was gay.

To add to the concoction of drama, in Perth he got himself into a relationship with an Australian guy who was in a committed relationship and had been for 9 years... at least he had somebody to share what was going on with him.. on a superficial level anyway. It was a shock to discover he was taking anti-depressants, had a history of suicide attempts and was chronically depressed. To say now that I had no idea of what he was going thru probably gives you a sense of where I was at ... in my own little bubble thinking life was wonderful. I was fully into Landmark, participating, assisting and letting whoever I could know about how it would change their life too.

Body Ethics was the exercise technique I'd been teaching for 1.5 years after successfully completing the New Enterprise Incentive Scheme. I was living the lifestyle I'd been dreaming of, I 'worked' 15 hours a week as an instructor, walked along the beach each morning, bartered amazingly weird bodywork techniques in exchange for exercise classes, lived in a stunningly beautiful place, was in a relationship with a weird and wonderful guy... everything was possible and life was just perfect.

Until Philip and I came home from a holiday in Wittenoom to discover Erick had resolved the 'do I/don't I commit suicide??' question.

The same night I got a 'hello' call from somebody at Landmark to cover details for a course the following weekend... which Philip and I participated in. During the course Philip had an insight into his relationship with me and called it quits with us. I reminded him of Erick and what had happened, and I'd have to move out of his place sooner rather than later.

Like I say, my life was a little crazy at the time..... being offered a job with Landmark seemed like the perfect place to be. The Centre Manager at the time was a fantastic support, she even offered me her house for a week when I was looking for somewhere to live. Going on staff just seemed to be the right step forward and I leapt in head first.

Learning all the behind the scenes strategy's was at first amazing. I got to learn all the ways to register people from one course into another, how to manage evening sessions, set up teams to manage teams for registration opportunities.. identify opportunities to make announcements at key moments, and OMG... personally meet all the Landmark Forum leaders. Me? Working with the leaders one-on-one, I was in heaven!

WOW, I was important, and I could work until midnight, one or two am three or four nights a week without a weekend off for at least three months.

The corporate lifestyle eventually caught up with me and I missed my targets once to often so I was put on a warning. For a year. That meant no bonuses unless I reached all my targets in one quarter. I got really close one quarter, filled the required teams for seminars and communications programs, the Relationships seminar had 100 participants which was an all time record for Perth, TMLP was on track, payments were all in on time, registration teams were full.... and I missed the MA (minimum acceptable) target for the CAP by .06%... shame, I stayed on the warning with a screw you attitude for another 9 months.

I just couldn't work out why I wasn't connecting with the new Centre Manager.... she'd connected with the new golden girl who slept with people who assist to make sure her teams were always full.... SHE even got to be the new Centre Managers bridesmaid at the wedding of all Landmark weddings. Me and the new CM didn't get on.. I wasn't even invited to the wedding. I thought that letting her know I didn't like her at one of our getting straight with each other meetings could earn some respect maybe... WRONG!

I left staff in a shocking space... I'd put on weight, started to smoke and thought I was a failure..... even tho' I stepped into a position as a Branch Manager for a recruitment company and more than doubled my salary, I still felt like I was the worlds' biggest failure.

The worst thing was having to manage my thinking, the monkey chatter was oh-so-loud... what was Landmark all about? Was I going crazy? Is the world all about widgets? Was I an automated robot? How would I unlearn what seemed to be embedded in my mind/body and soul? Did I have a soul, or was Landmark right and I was just a lump of flesh full of complaints about what was wrong with the world, my life, and ME? Who could I talk to about my experience... and Would that voice in my head ever stop questioning Landmark?????

I just couldn't get with the widgets thing at Landmark, when the Centre Manager said I had to think of people as widgets moving from one course to another, Imy world got shattered. I had a completely different picture of what Landmark should be like. I made a dork of myself when an employee from the States facilitated a staff conference to give staff the run down on automation... it was a defining moment for people who'd agreed to BE accountable for the future LEC2020.

There's so much information to share, I'm aware that this may not make sense initially... it will all come together, eventually. Some people might be wondering why Corporation has a line thru it..... that's because Landmark was a Corporation between 1997 and 2002. Very briefly, Werner Erhart founded EST, sold that to the employees who changed the name to Landmark Education and created a charter until the year 1997.

A team of people worked on new documents to 'charter' Landmark from the years 1997 to 2020, then the corporation Landmark Education was introduced at five big events. One was at Dallas Brooks Hall in Melbourne where people from all over Aus and New Zealand attended an open forum to discuss the documents. Media was also invited, however I don't know how much interest there was from 'outside' Landmark.

From the new context the structure of the company was changed quite dramatically and anybody who was not aligned with the new context, mission, charter, strategy, look of the corporation could leave. A few Forum leaders, staff, and program leaders left when given the opportunity to choose. I'd been employed for two weeks, when we got back to Perth each of the staff gave their word to being accountable for the future LEC2020... unbeknowns to us it was a condition for our employment.

Having seen the movie 'the Corporation', I am not at all surprised the 'C' got dropped in 2002... so many comparable references could easily be made if that C was still there. There are a few thousand people born from the 'C' era, the space in time a company introduced a disciplined structure of automated scheduling "to empower and enable people and organizations to generate and fulfill new possibilities".

Some people have been left disempowered and questioning whether they've been used as recruitment agents for an ingenius structure.